We live in a world where forgiveness can be hard to come by. More and more often you are hearing of families being torn apart and friendships ending over our inability to forgive.
I get it, because I have been there myself; and if I am being completely honest, which I always will be, I still struggle to forgive at times.
Human nature takes over and says, “you’ve wronged me for the last time, or that was an unforgivable offense”. Forgiving is NOT easy, especially when we have to do it OVER and OVER again!
If feels like there should be a point where we should just stop being required to forgive, but there isn’t; and THANK GOD for that. Because if there was, then God would have a point where He could stop forgiving us and wouldn’t that be awful?
God Forgives Us
What if God were able to just stop forgiving, as many of us have stopped forgiving? What if one day He told us “no, enough is enough, you’ve wronged me for the last time.”? We’d be in big trouble, wouldn’t we?
I know I would. Daily, hourly, maybe even minute to minute at times; I am seeking God’s forgiveness. A slip up here, a mess up there.
As humans, we are constantly seeking God’s forgiveness, yet we are usually unwilling to freely give it to others.
Our feelings are hurt, they messed up one too many times; we can’t possibly be expected to forgive them AGAIN, but you know what we can and we must.
We Can Forgive Because He First Forgave
God never asks us to do anything that He has not already done. He has already forgiven you OVER and OVER again, and He is just asking you to have the same mercy for someone else.
Your human nature tells you not to forgive, your human nature tells you it is impossible, but through HIM you can do all things.
If you are currently struggling to forgive someone begin to seek God on helping you overcome and FINALLY forgive once and for all. It is the most freeing thing you can do.
Here are three things that have helped me forgive when it feels impossible:
1. Pray for the Person
This is HARD, but it is also the most powerful thing you can do. There is POWER in prayer. I have found it is really hard to be upset with someone as I pray for them.
It may take time, and you will probably have to be consistent with this; but over time God will soften your heart toward that person, and you will find it much easier to forgive them.
2. See Them Through God’s Eyes
This is another tough one (I never said this would be easy). Look at them the way God would look at them. If you are a parent, think of the love you have for your child. That is the same love God has for them.
Yes, they messed up, yes, they hurt you, but they are still a child of God and deserve love and respect. Pray that God will open your eyes and allow you to see them as He sees them, the next time they hurt you or wrong you; because it will probably happen again. Hello, we are HUMAN.
Begin to seek God to see them through His eyes. They are His child, and we need to treat them accordingly.
3. Research Forgiveness in Scripture
The Word is loaded with scriptures on forgiveness. It is the foundation of Christianity. We are able to become Christians because Christ forgave us.
Find scriptures that really resonate with you in this area and memorize them. When you feel unforgiveness beginning to manifest in you, rebuke it and instead fix your mind on the scripture you memorized.
In Conclusion
If you are harboring unforgiveness, you are putting a wedge between you and God. I know this from experience. I spent years of my life refusing to forgive.
It seemed as though I would finally find it within myself to forgive, only to be wronged again and have to start the process all over again. It was exhausting!! Harboring unforgiveness is exhausting!
It was not until I stopped trying to forgive on my own will and began to allow Christ to forgive though me, that I was finally able to forgive.
We can only forgive because we were first forgiven. Seek God today on finally forgiving once and for all.
Realize that once you forgive it will probably not be the last time you have to forgive. Probably even that very same person for the same offense.
Forgiveness is an ongoing thing, and we should be grateful for that because that means Christ’s forgiveness towards us is ongoing as well.
Even when it feels impossible you CAN forgive. You can do this through HIM.
Don’t try to do it on your own will, you don’t have to, and you’re not expected to do it alone. Christ can help you do it through HIM.
These are such beautiful words! I struggle to forgive sometimes when it seems like it is a constant issue. You’re right though, this is so important!
It is definitely difficult to forgive when it keeps happening, it is something I have to continue to work on too!
This is such an important post, because harboring unforgiveness is like poison to us and keeps us in bondage. I pray on nearly a daily basis for God to grant me and all those I pray for, the ability and willingness to grant forgiveness and extend compassion to others, just as He does to us. I also pray for conviction leading to repentance, restoration, and reconciliation.
It really is such an important thing and can be so difficult to do at times. Prayer is definitely the solution. Thank you for your thoughtful comment.
Forgiveness can be SO hard, but it’s vital. It allows us to let go of negative emotions and move forward. Thanks so much for this post! Great tips!
xo, Taylor (www.tayloramead.com)
Thank you! I completely agree that it allows us to let go of negative emotions. We only hurt ourself by not forgiving.
There are times when prayer is the only answer. I must always remember forgiveness is for me, not the other person. The other person has the right to turn down my forgiveness or to embrace it. Either way, I have done what God asked of me in humbleness.
So true! Can still be so challenging at times, but prayer is definitely the answer.